“Well, I can do that…” I muttered.
Why is it so hard to accept help? To let someone do something for you, easy or difficult… What does it matter who hoovers the stairs?
There are various answers to this question, but it all comes down to the critical voice inside us that tells us: WE SHOULD DO IT ALL OURSELVES.
This critical voice generally has two origins.
1. Upbringing. From the moment we are born, we raised to be independent. Tie your own shoelaces, ride your own bike, and clean up your own mess. Accepting help becomes associated with weakness.
2. Self-worth. We fear rejection: what if we asked for help and they said no? We would not want to be a burden to someone else, they are so busy already…
Quickly, automatically, and unconsciously, the critical voice inside us convinces ourselves of the above. Analyzing it and putting it to paper is often the first step to realizing its ridiculousness.
Then we can challenge these beliefs, and learn to ask for help.
And by doing so, prove ourselves wrong. Because knowing when to accept help is not weak. Quite the opposite.
And others love being asked for help. It strokes their ego. Why take that away from them?
Our builder chose not to hear me. He’s been vacuuming every day before leaving. No construction dust in my house. A breath of fresh air.
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